At home and on social media, you have a blast like a rock star. But in public, you shy away from looks and contact, and you feel relieved when your plans break down. Here’s how to find the right balance.
Counterattack social anxiety
Don’t let your social anxiety take over. Rather, acknowledge its existence and assert your control and willingness to enjoy life. Do whatever is possible to temper it. Standing up to it allows you to reprogram your brain and release the grip of your anxiety. According to Dr. Robert Leahy, author and professor of psychology at the Weill-Cornell School of Medicine, untreated social anxiety could increase the risk of alcoholism, depression, loneliness, professional decline and celibacy. A situation which is far from ideal! It is therefore essential to target and confront your anxiety. In fact, you can continue to live with it without anything bad happening to you.
Expose yourself to your fears
The success of treating anxiety with exposure is the subject of many studies. This is revealed by the meta-analysis. We tend to run away from the object of our fears and fear what we are avoiding. To get out of this vicious circle, we have to expose ourselves gradually and without fear to the elements that trigger our phobias. List the situations that worry you in order of importance and start with the least threatening. This first scenario might boil down to asking a stranger for directions, and the most disturbing thing to asking your boss for a raise. It doesn’t matter if he doesn’t take you seriously, what matters is taking the step. Social anxiety makes you shy and helpless and you have to be able to thwart it. As a treatment you can search by havening practitioners near me and have the experts available there.
It is sometimes a necessary evil: exposing yourself to your fears also means progressing and having self-confidence.
According to Mark Tyrell, therapist and co-founder of Uncommon Knowledge programs, asking questions is a perfect way to socialize when you have nothing to share in a social setting. Ask open-ended questions like, “How did you meet the hostess?” Ask for advice: “What were the last good movies that you saw? »Start the conversation with relevant questions. Questions about where the toilet is or the bottle of vodka do not count.
Give yourself a break
The more you let fear and anxiety dominate your life and control your brain, the more you mentally relate your anxiety to specific places or events. In Psychology Today, Eric R. Maisel suggests a visualization technique for calming anxiety that involves defining a mental picture of relaxation. It can be a sunset on a beach, grasses swaying in the wind, the dance of fallen leaves from a tree or the swing of a hammock under a blue sky to birdsong. When you’ve found the perfect performance that relaxes you, make sure you involve all of your other senses.What are the smells and sensations you experience? What sounds do you hear? Repeat the exercise until it feels as natural as checking for a message on your cell phone.